Fading Pride
by Gloria Byrd
Summary: Solas is ready for his grand scheme to come to a close. The Veil is waiting, but not everything will go according to plan. He will face his worst fears. His actions put Lavellan's life at risk. They may not be able to save one another from demons, both from the Fade and within themselves. His pride could end Thedas unless he changes everything. He is "all new, faded for her..."


Disclaimer: I do not own any properties of Dragon Age.

It was time.

Solas turned his gaze to the sky patched with clouds. Birds flew and sang in it, unaware of their impending deaths. He raised his staff. Green swirled around it as he concentrated on the spell. Mists of the same color rose around him. Thunder unaccompanied by lightning boomed through the hills. The sky flashed a picture of the Fade. Sweat poured down his brow. The sky flickered again. And again. And again. The periods between flashes became as short as blinks. His staff quivered like a branch in a tempest. Shining cracks forked through its metal surface. His grip tightened. His hands burned. He cried out in agony just as the sky tore open like a cloth. Magic flowed into him like a flood. He felt his wrinkles disappear, his vision brighten, his muscles mend. The Veil was destroyed. He fell to his knees, panting, and looked up at the sky. It was now green, complete with floating black islands, spirits, and demons. The spirits screamed in confusion of the world they had only seen glimpses of. Then, they cautiously left their domain for Thedas. The demons chuckled maliciously and ran out to find ways to cause mayhem. His agents stood behind him with weapons ready. Solas stood and turned to them. "Protect any elves you find and bring them here," he commanded. They nodded and hurried away over the darkened hills.

"_Solas_. Solas. Solas!" A voice screamed in his head. He clenched his forehead in his hands in pain, dropping his staff. He recognized that voice.

"_Vhenan_!" he called. No answer. "Nyght!" Her name in his voice reverberated over the hills. Still nothing. Telepathy . . . that was an ability that had been extinct since the creation of the Veil. It worked. It worked! But Nyght was in trouble. Solas seized his staff and searched for her in his mind. She was a beacon.

"_Vhenan_," he spoke to her over great distances, "are you all right?"

"Solas?" She recovered from the shock of his voice momentarily. "What have you done? We have hundreds of demons storming Skyhold! Thousands more must be attacking villages, cities, innocent people! They, we, stand no chance!"

He was days' journey away from Skyhold. He would never reach her in time. He fell, only catching himself with the help of his staff. "Keep fighting! Please just . . . just keep fighting!"

He could imagine the shrieks of terror at the sight of the sky being torn open. He could nearly see pride demons storming Skyhold's gates, their electric whips ripping through defenses. Nyght, Cole, everyone he had spent a year adventuring with would be slaughtered by his own pride. A part of him wanted to laugh, another to rebuke the thought: his naming was accurate.

"Is this what you wanted?" She grunted even in his thoughts with the exertion of battling the monsters. He could almost hear the screeches of despair demons in the distance.

"No," he uttered. Even in the countryside, he could hear horrifying noises, see demons descending on villages like locusts. Monstrosities drifted from above to end him. There were too many, and he was all alone. He was going to die alone, Nyght would hate him as she died too, and Thedas would be obliterated. This was nothing like what he wanted.

This was a nightmare.

"_Dirth ma, harellan. Ma banal enasalin. Mar solas ena mar din_."

Solas returned to reality with a start . . . what was reality at the moment, anyway. He was in the Fade, physically. Nyght stalked beside him, black hair reflecting the glare from the green sky overhead and pale, starry eyes squinted in her search for possible threats. The Nightmare. It was the Nightmare. Solas shuddered. He had experienced all of that within heartbeats, but it felt like a lifetime.

"_Banal nadas!_" he shouted to the sky. No reply came. Coward, the Nightmare. He moved alongside Nyght with his staff raised. He would protect her from demons, both those in the Fade and within himself. He had planned on telling her about his true identity as Fen'Harel, but as he lived through that vision, he could not let events play out to end that way. When she saw him beside her, she smiled lovingly. He returned the gesture and brushed her hand with his. How he wished he could tell her everything, but he would not let pride of his elven lineage be his doom. He would do it differently. He would keep her safe. Hiding the truth was the only way, he realized, and with that, his heart broke. One day he must leave her and never return. He would find a way to protect her from the demons and Forgotten Ones from the Fade when he tore down the Veil, even if her absence meant him facing his worst fear.

He thought this just as they came upon gravestones. The party stopped in alarm when they saw that in each was etched a name and the greatest fear of the Inquisitor's companions. Solas knelt in front of his. "Dying alone," it read. Nyght set a hand on his shoulder, and he, in turn, set his hand on hers.

"I wouldn't let you," she said to him.

The edges of his lips curled at her affection, but he did not turn around. "You may not have a choice," he mumbled.

"What?" She did not seem to have heard him.

"Nothing." He stood. "It is time we moved on."

Nyght nodded and stayed by his side as they walked along the path. His interest in the Fade was not piqued this time. His thoughts buzzed with fears and abandoned dreams for love.

Then, the demons attacked. He did not see them until they were upon him. An icy blast struck his chest, flinging him backwards. The chill spread to his limbs, numbing him almost completely. The pain buzzed just as his thoughts. He fell into the waters at his feet. Green blasts struck him. Lightning from a pride demon struck the water. His vision blurred and darkened. He heard Nyght cry out his name. His staff was no longer in his fingers. A terror demon crouched over him and opened its elongated mouth filled with teeth. Its many black eyes reflected Solas's fearful face. An explosion sent the demon to the ground. Nyght knelt beside Solas. She held a healing potion to his lips.

"Drink."

Solas could hardly see her through his darkening vision, but he could see well enough to notice blood seeping through her armor on one of her shoulders. He shook his head and pushed the bottle back to her. "You."

"I'll be fine. I need to help the others. Hurry up, and take it already!" She glanced back to survey the battle. It wasn't going well. The pride demon batted Hawke away, knocking her into a wall. The Iron Bull sported several wounds on his arms and fell as two terror demons emerged from the ground beneath his feet. Alistair was down. Cole was the only one still fighting. If Solas had counted correctly, this was the last healing potion. They wouldn't be able to make it to the nearby supply cache in the thick of battle.

Solas pushed himself to his feet. Everything hurt, but he needed to make Nyght think she should drink it. Again, he pushed the bottle to her. She rolled her eyes and stuck it in a pocket. She wouldn't be able to get it to the others during the battle, either. No one would take it, then.

Solas took ahold of his staff and resumed firing bolts of elemental energies at the demons while trying to ignore his pain. Hawke and Iron Bull also rejoined the fight. Gradually, they wore down the demons until they fell and dissolved into the winds of the Fade.

Solas heard a splash behind him. The rest of the party began demanding healing potions. Solas turned around. Nyght lay in the waters. He ran to her. Her eyes were closed. The blood stain on her shoulder now covered twice the area. He kneeled and waited for her to breathe.

Nothing.

"_Vhenan_!" he exclaimed.

"Boss!" Iron Bull shouted.

The rest called out, "Inquisitor!" except for Cole who stood behind them all and watched the scene without expression.

Iron Bull now stood beside Solas with the crate of healing potions in hand. Solas snatched a bottle from the box, uncorked it, and poured it in her mouth. He feared it would not work when she did not swallow. He put his hands on her cheeks and watched for a sign of life in her still face. Her _vallislin_ stood out against her ashen skin. "Please wake up." He leaned over her and whispered, "I can't lose you again."

Her silver eyes shot open. "Solas!" She wrapped her arms around him and clung to him.

He whispered into her silky hair, "Don't do that again."

She pulled away. "I don't plan to." Once he helped her up, she spoke to her companions. "Now let's go kill the Nightmare."

Iron Bull applauded her decision as they trudged through the murky waters toward the Nightmare and their path to freedom. As they tramped through a cave, Cole moved alongside Solas and spoke to him. "She healed and reopened the old wound. It bleeds, burns, blisters everything. She is the remedy and the ailment. The Nyght is your day in your night. You need the night, but you need the day. She is a star, and yet she can't be. Pride fades for her, with her, but you are pride."

"Please, Cole. Stop." He glanced around to check if anyone had heard their conversation. It did not appear so.

Cole sped up. His voice was now going as quickly as Solas's thoughts. "You are fading into that which you hated but now that which you love. She is a haven from loneliness, but for her sake, you must make yourself lonely." He inhaled sharply. "_All new, faded for her_. You are her only solace. She needs––"

"Do not tell me her thoughts. They are hers to keep and reveal as she wishes."

Cole stopped. The party continued without change.

The cave they passed through opened up to a sort of platform. Everyone's eyes shot open at the sight of an enormous spider with hundreds of eyes. It clicked its chelicerae and crawled forward menacingly. The Nightmare appeared on the platform, tattered robes and all. It waved its tentacles at the intruders.

"At last," it announced with a voice that reminded Solas of his worst fears, "you have found me."

"Let's get this old villain monologue over with, shall we?" Hawke declared.

The Nightmare grimaced, as well as it could, anyway, with such an inhuman face, and flew forward, claws outstretched. Nyght stunned it with a blast of ice, after which Iron Bull battered it with his greatsword, shattering the layer of cold. Solas created an explosion directed at its head. Cole whirled in a dance with his blades around the demon, striking it in its most vulnerable spots. Hawke and Alistair attacked it from the rear. As it became more and more injured, it summoned smaller monsters. He knew that to Nyght and Hawke, they were spiders, but he saw them as embodiments of his nightmare: loneliness and the loss of Nyght. He destroyed them eagerly and then returned to confronting the Nightmare.

"Even if you defeat me," it spoke in Solas's mind, "your pride will end you. Your destruction of the Veil will bring more fear into the world than the Blights ever could, and then I will reform and feed on that fear. Thedas will die at my hands, I can assure you."

"Get. Out. Of. My. Head. Demon!" Solas yelled as he threw a bolt of lightning at it. The Nightmare shook and evaporated. The Fade quaked. The giant spider moved before them, blocking their exit.

Hawke stepped forward and implored they leave. She would stay to defend them against the creature.

Alistair pushed stepped before her. "No. You were right. The Wardens caused this mess. A Warden must––"

Hawke told him that he must help the Wardens rebuild the order. Solas watched Nyght's indecision. Her lips parted with the pain of saying his name, of condemning an honorable man to death with a single word. "Alistair . . ."

He nodded. He wished them good luck as he ran, sword ready, toward the monster. Nyght watched him as they left. Solas took her arm and led her through the Fade portal. Mists rushed past them. They landed on the same cobblestones they had left at Adamant. Nyght did not have time to mourn. She informed the remaining Wardens of their mistake and her party's accomplishments in the Fade before exiling them. Solas nodded in agreement. They had served a demon and Corypheus. This could not be allowed to happen again.

"Take care of Varric for me," he heard Hawke say to Nyght. Solas moved alongside the Inquisitor.

"I'm sorry it came to this," he told her.

"It is not your fault," she reassured him while she watched Hawke leave. Solas cringed. In a way, all of this was his fault. He had let Corypheus take the orb in the first place. Nyght sighed. "The Hero of Ferelden will not be happy when she hears about this."

"How so?"

"She and Alistair were lovers."

"Oh."

She turned around. "We almost lost each other today. We could lose each other tomorrow, or the next day, or even a decade later."

His brow furrowed. "I suppose that is part of being chosen, whether by the people or by fate, whatever you wish to believe. Our lives are not our own. We must learn to live with the decisions others make for us and continue to do what is best for those we serve."

"You speak as though from experience."

He was. He knew this routine from his time as Fen'Harel in the time of elves. "I am merely observant."

"That is an accurate observation, then." She stepped forward and set her hands on his shoulders. "Promise me that what happened to Alistair and the Hero of Ferelden won't happen to us."

He loathed lying to her in this way, but telling the truth would bring forth the events they both wanted to avoid. "I promise." He wrapped his arms around her, and she leaned against his chest. "I will protect you," he whispered as he ran his fingers through her ebony hair. Eventually, he would have to protect her from himself, but for now, for just a few stolen heartbeats, he found peace in the moment and abandoned pride, himself, and duty.

**A/N: Thanks for reading! ****Check out my other ****Dragon Age** **fics: ****Immortal**, **"Sweet Sorrow," "Come the Dawn," and "Catch and Release." ****Please leave a review and follow & favorite!**


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